Naturally, people have started asking whether FreeBSD is affected. The FreeBSD Security Officer has not yet released an official statement, but in the meantime, here is a brief look at the issue as far as FreeBSD is concerned.
Oslo is experiencing a cold spell, and Karin has been complaining about being cold at night. We have a new heating system with thermostats in each room, but I haven’t yet programmed them all. In the meantime, we’ve set up a portable electric heater in the bedroom.
She will be impressed by your strength
I’m out of shape, but still pretty good at lifting and carrying and shit like that.
Enjoy your carnal pleasures
Last night’s chili con carne went down pretty well, even though I ran out of cumin.
Can you have satisfaction 3 times a night?
Some days, I like to come home, hack on FreeBSD for a bit, then cook up a storm and watch a couple of episodes of Doctor Who or Jessica Jones after dinner. Other days, I just want to heat up leftovers and crawl into bed with my Kindle.
Proven way to get rid of male problems
I wish it were that easy, but I don’t think there is a silver bullet for toxic masculinity and all its concomitant problems (such as the GamerGate and Red Pill movements and the rest of the so-called Manosphere).
(Well, technically, from the University of Oslo’s abuse address, because I’m on call this week, so it is my job to wade through that crap.)
Do you wish to impress your woman every night?
Last night, Karin was in a videoconference, and I made a sausage and chick pea soup so it was done when she came out of our home office. She loved it.
Are you ready to become immense for ladies?
I’m already 1.83 m (6′0″). If Karin wants something from a shelf I can’t reach, well, we own several stepladders.
Do you know what your wife wishes during nights?
Sleep. Which is difficult enough since she’s a very light sleeper, our circadian rhythms don’t precisely align and we have a cat who likes to dance on our bladders before settling down for the night.
Touch her heart tonight.
I am very proud of Karin’s achievements, and try to remind her on a regular basis.
Very good technique to intensify your love life
I’ve heard good things about massage oil.
Achieve every girl’s bed fast
So we’ve been redecorating and when the bedroom was done I had to disassemble, move and reassemble the bed all on my own, because Karin was abroad for a conference and I wanted to surprise her with a finished bedroom when she got back, and it must have taken me a good couple of hours. I could have used a hand.
Keep your girl happy this night
I think I’m going to make chili con carne tonight, I hope she likes it!
One fine morning, the King summoned Gerrard, Captain of the Guard, to attend to him at Council.
Gerrard bowed as he approached his monarch. “You asked for me, Sire?”
“Gerrard, my good man, I keep hearing stories about a band of smugglers led by a man who calls himself the Fox. I want to know what your men are doing about it.”
“Sire—we have guard posts and roving patrols, and sometimes we catch a smuggler or two, but they move quietly through the woods and brush, wearing camouflage, and they can choose any direction of approach, whereas we have to stretch our forces along the entire border.”
“Very well, Gerrard. I hereby ban the manufacture, sale and use of camouflage clothing except for the needs of the Royal Guard. You are dismissed.”
Three months later, the King summoned Gerrard again.
“I hear that the smugglers are still operating, despite the measures I ordered. What do you have to say for yourself?”
“Banning camouflage clothing cut off the smugglers’ supply, but did not prevent them from using what they already had. We made more arrests when they ran out, but then they started making their own out of green, gray and black fabric, and we’re back to square one.”
“Very well. Henceforth, the manufacture and sale of green, gray or black fabric or clothing shall be illegal, except for the needs of the Royal Guard. Get to it, Gerrard.”
Some months later, Gerrard was once again summoned to discuss the matter of the Fox.
“I am very displeased, Gerrard. I would have thought your men would have little trouble catching smugglers now that they can no longer buy or make camouflage clothing. And I have been told that the villagers are restless and discontent.”
“Sire, the smugglers are tying grass, moss and branches to their clothes, and blending in better than ever before! And the villagers are complaining that the ban on camouflage and dark clothing is making it difficult for them to hunt—we forbade them to use vegetation like the smugglers do.”
“There is only one solution, then. Burn down the forests and the brush. Let us see the Fox try to sneak through a charred wasteland!”
“Do not question my orders, Gerrard. Burn it all down.”